20 Things Most People Wouldn't Do

Everyone does a few things that other people generally wouldn't do. Here are 20 of mine.

These are brief statements. A more detailed explanation of each point can be found here.

1. In my poorer days I ate dog food, insects and roadkill.
2. I spent a night in an isolated cabin in the woods with a stranger who had a big knife and was wanted by the police.
3. I walked several miles along a main road totally naked (and quite sober) because I’d lost my clothes.
4. I was detained by the Norwegian police and spent a night in the lock-up.
5. I was once the sole survivor of a plane crash.
6. I’ve slept in parks, on building sites, on the side of the road, in an igloo and in front of a class of kids I was supposed to be teaching.

   

7. At uni, dinner was often two packets of chocolate biscuits. And I'm still alive!
8. For a while, when I was young, I used to throw up every Thursday.
9. I got mugged in New York – twice – on the same day. The second time, I had nothing left to pinch.
10. I was a prime suspect in a serial rape case and had to spend 20 minutes spitting into a cup to prove my innocence.
11. I’ve performed as a soprano at the Royal Albert Hall in London.
12. As a student in Cambridge, I decorated my room with dead birds hung from chains of paper clips.
13. I’ve hitch-hiked across the Sahara (see here) and from Sudan to Zambia (see here).

    

14. I was once woken up in the night by frogs gathering on my back.
15. I killed a blackbird by throwing a croquet mallet at it. (I didn’t expect to actually get it and felt bad about it afterwards.)
16. I was refused entry to Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe) on account of vagrancy.
17. I cremated my teddybear after years of trying unsuccessfully to saw its head off with a toothless comb.
18. I once connected a long string of 9V batteries together in a shop and electrocuted myself.
19. I’ve been trodden on by an elephant, bitten by a pelican and several spiders, and frost-bitten on the left nipple.

    

20. I’ve stayed at a hotel that had sharks in the swimming pool. I still got in, only to be chased by a turtle.